I will scream your name into a bush

Want your name screamed into a bush? I'm your man. Want me to scream things other than your name into a bush? I'm also your man. As long as it includes me screaming and that scream entering a bush, look no further than my services.

Other people might offer slight whisperings or nominal vocalizations into shrubberies, but I go one step beyond. I will yell your name the loudest anyone has ever yelled it, and it will be into a bush. Any extras (such as phrases or other oddities) can be covered with an extra 5 dollars. My services are so amazing, that price is a steal. A steal, I say. 

The base gig is a 30 second video of prolonged screaming of your name into a bush. Sadly, the bush cannot be customized. However, tone of voice can be altered upon request.

Let's work together to have me scream your name into a bush!